Progress

Yep, I'm ever-so-slightly pregnant. 4w5d. That scary hold-your-breath, don't-count-your-chickens period of time before you've even seen a tadpole with a little flickering pixel of a heartbeat on ultrasound. Tentative due date, pending confirmation at my first prenatal appointment in mid-May, is January 7.

Morning sickness set in much sooner than last time, and I am spending an unbelievable amount of my limited energy on trying not to toss my cookies. I was fairly nauseous for most of the first trimester with LL, but I never actually threw up even once, despite putting myself into some very questionable situations (several long and turbulent airplane rides, exposure to new and very smelly foods, and an ill-advised IMAX movie, to name a few). This time around, I'm already feeling sicker than last time, and I haven't even reached the point when I first started to feel morning sickness last time. Yikes! Not even five weeks yet, and I'm already carrying around saltine crackers.

When I was pregnant with LL, we waited until we were safely past 13 weeks to tell absolutely anyone about the pregnancy. (We told my brother around 9 weeks, due to some special circumstances, but that was it; even our parents didn't find out until Week 13.) We hope to keep this pregnancy under wraps as well, as much as possible. If I continue to be so much more sick in the first trimester, that might be tough. And, much to my dismay, one of my friends already knows. We went to her daughter's birthday party last weekend, and she served a lunch of cold cut sandwiches. I had just found out that I was pregnant, and hadn't reviewed all of the foods that I'm supposed to avoid eating, so I took a sandwich. And then remembered that cold cuts are no-nos. And I apparently swore quietly under my breath and tried to be subtle about returning the sandwich to the tray. But my friend noticed, and asked me later if I was pregnant. I tried to come up with some other reasonable excuse for putting the sandwich back, but I totally failed, so... yeah, she knows. She then told me that she worried about serving cold cuts, in case anyone was pregnant, but then decided that it would be a fun "test" so that she could discover any unannounced pregnancies before everyone else knew. Which is, um, clever I guess, but I kind of resent falling into her little trap. It's still very very very very early for us, and without even seeing a heartbeat on ultrasound yet, I really really hate that the cat is even a little out of the bag.

But, there it is. 4w5d. I'm thrilled, but trying very hard not to get my hopes up. Counting down to the first ultrasound at seven weeks.