Monday, March 9, 2009

Thank You, Pump-In-Style, For Being So Discreet

Know how to freak out a young male computer scientist?

Say it's the middle of the morning, and you're walking out of your office carrying your Pump-In-Style, in its stylish black shoulder bag, cleverly disguising the pump, cones, milk cooler, etc., hidden inside. A colleague spots you exiting your office, and hurries to catch up with you. He says that he has a question that he really needs your help with, and is it okay if he walks with you so that he can tell you about it? Then he spots the black bag. It's too small to be a laptop... it's too big to be a purse..... He grows uncertain. He asks, "Where are you off to, anyway?"

Answer him honestly: "I was on my way to pump some breast milk!"

Then enjoy the awkward silence as he tries to decide whether you're still eligible to help him with his question. Observe with amusement how he suddenly can't quite figure out where to focus his eyes, and finally shifts his gaze to stare intently at a doorknob. (Read his really obvious thoughts as his brain chants over and over, "Don't look at her breasts! Don't look at her breasts! Don't look at her breasts!") Throw him a bone by suggesting that you talk to him later, then wait patiently while he desperately searches for an appropriate farewell. ("Okay, have fun! Umm.... I mean...... see you later, I guess.......")

So, next time... less honesty?

5 comments:

DuWayne Brayton said...

So, next time... less honesty?

Hell no! Make 'em sweat.

A lovely friend of mine will go as far as to explain that her breasts are getting way to heavy, gotta go milk them... One of my best friends grew quite scarlet in the face when she laid that one out.

Amanda@Lady Scientist said...

If nothing else, honesty leads to more blog fodder. :-)

Jennifer said...

Hilarious!

To answer your question...hell no!

Honesty is much more fun!!!

Jen said...

Less honesty would not be nearly as much fun!

ScientistMother said...

No way to less honesty! For one, its takes away our opportunity for fun and 2) why do you have to be discreet? the only way to "normalize" breast feeding is to be open about it.